Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Flip Out

Well friends,

I'm writing you from lovely New Mexico.  I came down here to visit my dear Grandmother, who is 92 and pretty fragile.  It's been an intense trip and I can't quite put my finger on why.  Perhaps when we journey to our roots we inevitably get stirred up?  I had these lovely visions of warmth and connection and ease as I was planning the trip and while nothing terrible has happened, it's been a bit of a wild ride, emotionally.

I got to spend the night with my Grandmother in Roswell, New Mexico where she has a home.  She is so fragile that we spent about 30 minutes together and then it was back to bed for her.  I started to see just how much sadness is in me at the thought of her dying.  She seems fine with the idea but for me, it's pretty upsetting.

C'est la vie!!

We're all going to die at some point and yet it's a hard space to talk about and deal with when we're facing it.  In addition to facing my Grandmother's passing, there have been some exciting developments business-wise that seemed to come out of nowhere.  It's not real yet, so we'll see what happens over the next few months.  Suffice it to say I've been flipping out a bit for various reasons as the trip unfolds.

I have a feeling this FLIP OUT energy is pretty prevalent now.  We can go from one extreme to another quickly and without warning.  One minute, everything looks sad and bleak and the next minute things are fantastic and amazing.  I hope to explore this more in the Stonestreet Cafe this Thursday at 6pm PST/9pm EST, so please join me at 12radio.com.

I had originally intended this to be a "working vacation" but my cell phone is blocked by thick adobe walls and the internet is intermittent at times where I am.  I'll be back in action by Saturday, so come by 12listen.com during our happy hour from 1-4pm pacific for a reading.  A fresh perspective is now taking root and I would love to share it with you.

That's about it for me.  My dear husband is out in the city with the kids, so I thought I'd sneak you a quick note.  Who knows when he will be back because for some reason, cell phones are rather strange in this adobe heaven.  I can't wait till my kids go back to school so I can spend more time with you!!  It feels like this summer has been a comedy of errors in terms of this dear space we share.  I promise, I'm going to come back with some real focus SOON.

xoxo
-Julia

No comments: